Sunday, March 18, 2018

And so it goes.

I haven't written in a while, choosing to use Facebook as a microblog as I can't get my words together any more; or at least not like I used to. But I love to write and get people's feedback, good and bad, and it's time to at least try.

Or as I believe Yoda said, "There is no try. There is only do."

 I miss having friends who would just come over and keep me company. I've since learned of a needlework group about 15/20 miles from here, and I want to go. I still feel a lot of pain (five out of ten is my new normal) and I really, really want to take a Barre class. My flexibility is there, but I'm scared. I'm sure I'll be the fattest, most out of shape person there, but if I can't get over fear then I might as well give up. All the good things that happened to me had an element of fear, with that fear turning into exhilaration.

It's time to start over. Things are not good right now, but honestly, who can wait around for things to calm down in order to get into motion?

So today's question, if you feel like sharing, is what got you out of your rut? Did you do it alone or with family/friends?


  1. We will be home mid April. I would love to see you! Out of a rut or through a battle... one step-one day at a time. Just keep moving forward.

  2. You should take that class, drive where you need to!!! You are right fear is just a different way to spell can't and can't never did anything!!! You have never let fear stand in the way before! Don't start now!!! Love You Bunches Lori!!!

  3. I,m so sorry you are down right now. I pray it will get better for you soon. I have had major depression my whole life and for the last 3 years because of a change in meds suicide is always intruding on my mind. I wont do it but it makes it hard to fake normal with that in the back of my mind. I don't hurt near like you do and I keep going but I don't really want to. In your case you need relief so you an get on with living again. You don't have to get "addicted", I have never ever taken an extra pill because I know where that goes and it has been since 2007. I get down to tolerable and that's good enough. If you are resisting pain relief please reconsider. You have always carried on and you can again. I guess I have just gotten pissed off enough at the health problems that I can.t let them win. No one cares if you gained weight Lori more than 50% of Americans are overweight now and you know you're not lazy or greedy so let it go. If I helped you in any way I'm glad, if I didn't I'm still praying for you.
    Love and hope to you , Jackie

    1. Jackie, I'm so sorry. I'm with you on how med changes can really be frightening .. the thing that's supposed to help us N O T feel suicidal often DOES. It's never far from my mind, I will admit. If it weren't for Zack, who knows what. But there's a reason why you and I are here. We just may not know it yet. <3


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